Friday Questions – April 8

2010/04/09

Last week I posted some questions and answers that I got through my Q&A Service. It’s a site where anyone can ask me anything and they can be anonymous or leave their name. I added the app to the right side of this blog so you can simply ask me anything you like.

Q: born and raised in Tacompton, WA. whats up with no Teriyaki joints in Bend? do you by any chance know of a good substitute?

What up Tacompton! I was not aware that WA had the Teriyaki capital of the world within its boarders. I know that BOR Jr always gets chicken teriyaki at Mio Sushi when we go there. I’ve gotten the Salmon teriyaki there a few times but I recommend you ask for light sauce as they tend to have a heavy hand.

I know you can get Teriyaki at Kona Mix Plate, Sumi’s, and Soba. Stop your whining. At least you can get some teriyaki in Bend. I haven’t had a good Vindaloo in ages. We need Indian food!

Q: Just how much do you love yourself?

Great question. There is nothing more that I like to talk about than myself. I’m the best…ARO-OUND…Nothings ever gonna keep me down!! Look, I like what I like. If you don’t like it, get the hell out.

Q: 10 Barrel. Pulled Pork Pizza. Dude. Gotta have it.

Not really a question. Pulled pork on a pizza is not something that I’m ever going to order. I have had the pulled pork sandwich and a pepperoni pizza and they are both good. I don’t have an official review ready just yet though.

Q: if you had to choose between The Sagebrush Classic and the Ghost Tree dinner – what would you choose?

I’ve never been invited to either so they can both go to hell.

Seriously, Come on! Give me the hook up! I want to go to both!! I’d love to do a write up on either. Fans, work on getting me invited will ya?

Q: Do you know why Hardy’s Hotwings and Hamburgers closed, stoped selling wings, and changed their name? That was a very bad move, in my opinion…

I’ve only had Hardy’s wings a couple of times. They were good. I’ve had their burger and didn’t really think it was anything special. I’ll have to give them another try now that they are just focusing on the burgers and ice cream. Maybe they are running from the bank and changed their name like all the furniture stores that are constantly going out of business just to reopen two weeks later. I want to open up a furniture store called “Going Out of Business Sale.” I mean, that would be the permanent sign on the building. Love it.

Q: Two questions on your most recent post (Olive Garden): 1. how much was the total bill? 2. was your waitress as hot as the one in the youtube video? If so, it was worth every penny.

I put the price of each dish and drink next to them. If you run Windows (which EVERYONE SHOULD…seriously just shut your damn Apple IIc using ass and get a real machine) just go to Programs > Accessories > Calculator. Add it up!

Our WAITER was alright, not hot but doable…if you know what I mean.

Q: Best resturant in bend OR downtown? Is it a good place for children? – AWESOME LADY

I hate “best” lists. That’s why I haven’t done a second one. My first Best Restaurants of Bend was sort of fun to write but it’s just my opinion. You all are fools for listening to any food reviewer. Of course, I am always right so maybe you should just follow me like drones.

It is too difficult for me to say who has the Best Restaurant in Downtown Bend. I have not been to all of them. I have never eaten at the D&D, who knows, they could be the best. If you’re old as dirt, your favorite should be Pine Tavern. Slightly younger than the old as dirt crowd, your favorite should be Zydeco.

I just call it like I see it folks. Zydeco is hella good but damn if the patrons aren’t all over the hill. I’m always the youngest in there. I really like going to Joolz, Blacksmith, Zydeco, and Toomies. None of which I would classify as a good place for children. A good place for children is to be in their seat with arms folded sitting quietly. If you pull that off, then you’re the tops in my book. Quit catering to your kids. They need to buck up and eat something other than Dino Nuggets or mini wieners. It won’t kill them to try some truffle oil mac’n cheese. Get them off the microwave diet AWESOME LADY!

Best kid friendly restaurants downtown are El Caporal, Soba, and Deschutes Brewery.

Q: best breakfast in bend

Again, this is not a question. ASK me anything! It’s the first damn word! ASK. Can a brother get a question mark?? Alright rude butt, I still like Jake’s Diner. Cheap, fast, huge portions. Jake’s is my favorite restaurant on the East Side and it’s TOTALLY East Side!

The Wife LOVES the Breakfast Club and will slap me if I don’t mention them.

Q: Where is the best place for Easter Brunch, you heathen!

I have no idea. I don’t celebrate Easter. I don’t even understand it. There is no consistency with this day and that just pisses me off. Sometimes it’s in March, or the end of April. There is a mutant rabbit running around neighborhoods, breaking into houses, stealing food and then hiding it in places and if you don’t find it, it rots and stinks up the house.

This entire thing doesn’t make any sense. Don’t go out to eat on days like this. Make some deviled eggs with your left over colored eggs (wait, can we still say colored eggs? Is that cool? I don’t think we should be talking about this), make up a batch of twice baked potatoes, asparagus, and get yourself some sort of glazed ham. That’s how you celebrate Easter. You can’t have Easter with EA*T.

Hey is Deschutes Brewery a child friendly place?

Judging by the ALWAYS wandering child walking around like he/she works there, yeah it’s pretty kid friendly. There is an battalion of high chairs by the L bar at all times and the staff is quick to clear out the huge mess made by all the infants, toddlers, and drunkers that make a mess at the tables. Yup, quite kid friendly.

The kids menu is pretty solid with your normal bar food kids menu. The kids pizza is money.

Q: We live in Portland, will be in bend for our sons 22nd birthday, and would like to find a unique. restraint to celebrate at. In the past we have gone to Benihana , the Melting Pot, Gustav’s, City Grill. Thanks for the help

I haven’t been to any of those places. It’s your son’s 22nd Bday. He wants to drink without you guys. Go to Deschutes cause you’re from Portland and you have to go there for a sampler tray, then head over to Blacksmith for a steak. After dinner you and your husband/wife head back to the Phoenix in since your 22 yr old is living in a tiny apartment with some stoner roommate (yeah, that bong is his roommates, honest) leaving your son to party it up at Blacksmith After Dark. Whooop Whooop!

You have a great website and I love reading where to get great eats in Bend as there is no other website like it for the area! My question is where to eat for Easter Brunch this year? So many places plan poorly for this big occasion.

Obviously I’m not the fastest to respond to anything. My bad. Hope you had a good holiday.

Best buffet??

Ugh. How about you sit down to a regular portioned meal instead of shoveling piles of mashed potatoes trip after trip trying to time it just right so you can get an extra thick slice of prime rib from the guy that cuts em fat? Buffets are not good. I can’t tell you how much they disgust me.

Everyone touching those tongs with their dirty ass hands, the “sneeze” guards are about as good of security as the Smile Greeter at Walmart, and the staff could give a damn about the tub of egg salad they need to get out onto the line where it gets to sit for hours. Yumm!

How do I get the recipe from VictorianCafe for Pistachio/banana pancakes?

I know one thing, you’re off to a bad start.

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Olive Garden – Bend Oregon

2010/04/05

Olive Garden

Good old Olive Garden. I know what I’m going to get before I even sit down…mediocre pseudo Italian American food that is lacking in flavor and originality. Chicken Parmesan, fettuccine alfredo, spaghetti and meatballs, and of course, the best salad and bread sticks in the WORLD!

“But BOR, how can you form your opinion about a restaurant that you haven’t been to?” asks the East Sider or transplant from the Midwest.

Because I’ve been to an Olive Garden a couple of times before, and in a couple different locations. They are all the same. You get the same exact experience no matter which one you go to. That is the way of the chain restaurant.

The much anticipated opening of the Olive Garden in Bend has kept the place slammed non stop. I tried a couple of times to visit while we were out in that direction but I refuse to wait for a table at a place like Olive Garden.

Finally the opportunity arrived and I was able to talk the Wife into going to the OG. It was an off hour for most restaurants but the Garden was still packed. Tables packed closely together and most of them filled with families containing young kids. They really packed the tables in. Many times the wait staff had to get uncomfortably close to the table while another passed behind them.

Looking over the menu of your typical “Italian” dishes that you find at almost all American Italian restaurants I couldn’t quite decide on what to get. Our waiter had already taken our drink orders (me – Stella Artois $4.65 / Wife – Lime Mint Fresco $7.25) and before those arrived, he had already asked us what we’d like to order. Water wasn’t even on the table but whatever. Turn and burn customer service IS hella fast.

When he came back with drinks and asked again if we were ready (I think we’d been at the table all of 4 minutes) we ordered an appetizer. I thought that would keep him at bay for a bit. It didn’t.

Twice more we said we needed more time to look over the menu. They must not be used to people that don’t know their entire catalog of dishes. Maybe they just assume we’re out for a super fast Soup, Salad and Breadsticks just for two:

We went ahead and ordered. He was back shortly with our appetizer but also with the world famous, and only thing anyone can say is good about the Olive Garden, the salad and bread sticks.

The point of ordering the appetizer was to get it before the salad and bread sticks. It turned out ok since the appetizer was a big disappointment. We went for the Create Your Own Sampler Italiano – “Choose from: calamari, stuffed mushrooms, fried zucchini, chicken fingers, fried mozzarella or toasted beef and pork ravioli.” I love fried anything (normally) so we went with mozzarella, toasted ravioli and calamari $10.95.


The plate was cleared away with most of the food still on there. The fried mozzarella was the only good part. The ravioli was way over cooked and very dry, and the calamari was incredibly under cooked. The breading was floury and almost doughy. It was weird.

For my entree I selected the Seafood Alfredo – $16.95 “Sautéed shrimp and scallops tossed with creamy fettuccine alfredo.”


I’ll wager anything that the shrimp was not sauteed at all. The shrimp and scallops seemed as if they were steamed or boiled. The fettucini was cooked well and there was tons of it. I ate to my fill, picked out the shrimp, left the scallops and was done with more than half left.

The Wife got the Tour of Italy but the photo didnt come out – $17.95 – “Homemade lasagna, lightly breaded chicken parmigiana and creamy fettuccine alfredo.” She gave me a taste of the lasagna and the chicken parm. The lasagna was ok. She says that she’d get it again if she had to go back. The chicken was overcooked.

The best part of the meal (of course) was the salad and bread sticks. The salad is just a simple iceberg salad with too much red onion, two olives (why only two OG, why?), a couple slices of tomato, peppercinis, and tons of croutons. The bread sticks are like sticks of buttery crack.


I showed the photo above to the Wife as I felt it came out really good. She said “Yup, that sums it up, the only good part as usual.” She also had a nice quote as we paid the bill. She said “Well, that’s exactly like I remembered it.”

Olive Garden
www.olivegarden.com
63459 U.S. 97
Bend, OR 97701
(541) 312-4760

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