La Costa Azul

2009/01/12

La Costa Azul

I visited La Costa Azul a long time ago and commented on Hack Bend about my experience. I ended up never writing the review for some reason though. So I recommended to some friends that we should give it a try. After being seated and snacking on the chips and salsa we ordered drinks. Everyone but “watching my calorie intake – Lucas” kept it real by ordering Negra Modellos or Pacificos.

The salsa had an odd flavor. I can’t quite put a finger on it but it tasted weird. It was slightly spicy but lacked the traditional tomato salsa flavor. I still ate it cause I was hungry but it wasn’t my favorite.

We ordered lunch and another round of beers (and a diet coke). And then we waited. And waited. And waited. While we waited the hot hostess kept coming back to our table, looking at us through her Lisa Lobe glasses and explaining why it was taking so long. I felt bad for the top half of her sweater as it was stretched out to capacity. She must have back problems with how off balance and top heavy she is. Best part of “diet coke’s” lunch was when Miss Mammaries had to reach across the table to the other side and totally encroached on his personal space.

Anyway, I ordered the Picadillo Enchiladas. When we ordered our food we were told that they had run out of rice and so we would get double the beans. That’s totally fine with us but instead of just serving us double beans and no rice, I think they held back on serving our food until they had time to make a fresh batch of rice. When Hispanic Lisa Lobe and her Sweater Kittens finally arrived with our food, she stressed that the plates were hot. She used oven mitts to put the plates down. As anyone does when you’re told that the plate is hot, you touch it just to see how hot it actually is. We all did and all our plates were cold.


My enchiladas were cold and the rice was a shade away from being plain white rice. Definitely not worth the wait just for freshly made rice. My enchiladas had barely enough meat for one enchilada let alone two, and were as flat as pancakes. No one at the table had anything nice to say about their dishes and after waiting as long as we did, no one was impressed. The food was cheap at only $6.99 for lunch, but the 12 ounce beers were $4.25 each! That’s just silly!

“Diet Coke” and I had to leave before the check arrived so I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to La Lisa Lobe but thought I’d pay tribute with a Spanish translation of a snippet of Stay.

“Usted dice que oigo solamente lo que quiero:
I don’ t escucha difícilmente, don’ atención de la paga de t a la distancia que you’ re funcionamiento a cualquier persona, dondequiera
I don’ t entiende si usted cuida realmente,
I’ m que oye solamente la negativa No, no, no, malo”

La Costa Azul
63055 Layton Avenue
Bend, OR 97701
(541) 322-3986

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

S.G.Loughlin January 12, 2009 at 4:57 pm

I thought this was a food review, not a boobie report.

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Jack Elliott January 12, 2009 at 6:20 pm

Boobie reports and additional details, such as the presence of Lisa Loeb glasses, are all very important when describing the ambiance of the restaurant. It helped this reader better picture the dining experience.

I, too, always check to see if the plates are hot. I’d say that 70% of the time (over the past 30 years, spread across countless Mexican restaurants) the plates are not cold. Of those, 10% are hot enough to be uncomfortable. The other 30% of plates are just cold.

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Jeff January 12, 2009 at 7:18 pm

I think every food report should include boobie reports where applicable. My only regret here is you included a pic of the food but not the waitress. sigh

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Jen F January 12, 2009 at 11:29 pm

RHPB appreciates the information about the twins. If you have a male server next time, let me know if he has a nice a**. Thx!

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Elizabeth January 13, 2009 at 1:56 am

How dare anyone negatively comment YOUR blog. It is YOUR blog, correct? If those losers don’t care for your writing they can read the restaurant review fluff from the Bulletin.

Keep ’em coming, boobs and all. No double entendre intended.

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Anonymous January 13, 2009 at 9:52 pm

OH GREAT – Why do I have a feeling that the next “Best Of” will be the “Best Of Boobies” review?

Sigh… The Wife

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Entrepreneur January 14, 2009 at 5:40 am

“Best of Bend Boobie Blog”

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Jack Elliott January 14, 2009 at 6:42 am

The most feared restaurant critic in France, Mr. François Simon, is a man who, "…prides himself on being an outsider and a provocateur. His columns describe not only a restaurant’s food, but also its service, décor and clientele, even down to the movement of the breasts of women around him."

(More here: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/dining/14simon.html?_r=1&hp)

"Mr. Simon may be the most feared and most read figure in France’s culinary world."

Bend Oregon Restaurants does well to follow Mr. Simon's fine example.

Reply

Prineville Princess January 14, 2009 at 9:20 pm

I ate at La Costa today…plates were warm, the “Wet” Chili Verde Burrito was great. But the sour cream portion that came with it was barely enough for two bites. And Lisa Loeb was not wearing a sweater, but the mountains were out.

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