McRib

2010/01/15

McRib

Yup, I took a bite of one. It wasn’t good.

I pulled up to the drive thru speaker box at the McDonald’s and before any pleasantries were exchanged, the voice immediately asked “Would you like to try our McRib?”

Thinking only of you, my loyalest of loyal followers, I responded “Absolutely I would” even though I really didn’t. I’ve never been enticed by the McRib. But since I felt an obligation to you, I went for it. Even though it cost me $3.49 and probably 2 years off my life according to Dr. Oz, I went for it, for you.


Upon opening the box I was slapped in the face by the sweet stench of BBQ. It was overpowering like when I rub all the free samples of cologne out of magazines on my shirt before going out to dinner.

It was drenched in sauce as you can see but I was able to scoop it up and muster up the strength to take a bite. I sunk my teeth into the spongy flesh of form pressed pseudo pork and proceeded to chew. It didn’t take much work as the prechewed meat flavored mass was easily ready to be swallowed.

I opened up the pipes and swallowed the bite thinking…”Hell yeah I could do Survivor.” Seriously, I don’t get it. The McRib is among the top ten most disgusting food items I’ve ever eaten. I’m pretty finicky but I’ve eaten some odd things in my day. I’ve eaten raw Kangaroo, live ants, boogers, edamame, grey tailed squirrel, gator, and more.

I could NOT stomach taking a second bite of this nastiness. You’re welcome.

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

Jack Elliott January 15, 2010 at 8:16 pm

You have thrown yourself on a grenade for your readers. I, for one, will stand you to a pint of your favorite should we ever meet.

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Laura January 15, 2010 at 9:37 pm

GAG!

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monkeyinabox January 15, 2010 at 9:39 pm

In my younger days I used to think the McRib was one of the best things from McDonalds. There was no Styrofoam container keeping the hot side hot, or the cool side cool, instead just a box to contain the saucy goodness that is (was) a McRib.

It had a BBQ flavor you would find nowhere else. The bun was special with it's cornmeal dusting (or at least that's what I hoped it was). The pickles added the final touch. Of course this was well before I knew what GOOD BBQ really was. It was before Supersize Me.

These days there is nothing (I mean NOTHING) on the McDonalds lunch/dinner menu that makes me salivate.

I haven't even bothered with the Angus burgers, so maybe BOR, you need to step up to the Mickey D's plate one more time and give us the scoop on those. 😉

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Anonymous January 15, 2010 at 10:06 pm

You aren't the man I thought you were. I bet if they wrote "Made in NWX" on it, you'd rave about it.

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Anonymous January 16, 2010 at 5:21 am

That is some seriously nasty, Gretta Van Sustern, looking stuff. I can't believe that you even had the one bite. The "sweet stench" was a warning sign from the Food gods.

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Karen January 16, 2010 at 5:39 pm

Judging from the monsoon in that box, McDonald's should rename it the McMoist.

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